USA File: Real estate magnate, realty TV host, political maverick Donald Trump rocks America’s establishment, defies Republican Party leadership, elected 45th President of the USA; Trump courts white working-class vote and rural areas, wins all the right states–e.g., FL, NC, OH, PA–to sweep Electoral College with 279 votes, trails slightly behind Hillary Clinton in popular vote; former Secretary of State secures West Coast, CO, NM, IL, VA, NE states, picks up 228 electoral votes; Republicans retain control over Senate, House of Representatives; Libertarian candidate, former NM governor Gary Johnson rakes up nearly 4 million votes nationwide; referenda in CA, NV, MA legalize recreational marijuana, same proposition fails in AZ; Putin congratulates Trump via telegram, UKIP leader Nigel Farage on Trump win: “I thought Brexit was big, but boy, this looks like it’s going to be even bigger”; 100s of university students, assorted leftists (as predicted) take to the streets in “Left Coast” cities, national capital, block traffic, smash windows to protest Trump victory; disheartened Clinton supporters besiege Canada’s immigration website, server crashes
November 9, 2016
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Judging by the hysterics in the West, Vladimir Putin has won the U.S. elections.
— pro-Kremlin satirist Mikhail Zadornov (source)